Photo Collection: Russian Cruise 70’s & 80’s

On December 28, 2013 by Tim Newman

Soviet Cruise 70s 80s Russia - sunbather 2]

The following pictures are great so I’m not going to try and add TOO much verbal guff to them. Basically I came across a bunch of photos from Russian cruises during the 70’s and 80’s and I smiled as I scrolled through them so I thought it best to pass the grin on.

Obviously some of the shots (all of them) are staged for the photographer and are probs to be used in marketing material. But that tells a tale in itself, what kinds of pictures would tempt a would-be Russian cruiser of the era?

This exact kind:

Soviet Cruise 70s 80s Russia - Bar

Eat all you can folks. Yes, that’s a house made out of cheese, what’s your problem?

Soviet Cruise 70s 80s Russia - Buffet

Height of luxury…

Soviet Cruise 70s 80s Russia - Cabin

What’s…. happening? Some kind of Thai themed restaurant with female Russian monks serving? I do not know.

Soviet Cruise 70s 80s Russia - Confusion

Eye ball cakes and frog balls.

Soviet Cruise 70s 80s Russia - Crab Eyes

“Your red shirt matches the red flowers so wonderfully Doreen, let me pass you a plate of food with more red on it, just to make the most of the redness here.”

Soviet Cruise 70s 80s Russia - Dinner

“This is no normal hairdryer, oh no sir… it shoots plastic bullets. The bullets are useful when the ship’s first mate gets out of hand late at night.”

“… and Margaret, don’t forget to mention that you use both orange and black hairbrushes will you?”

Soviet Cruise 70s 80s Russia - Hair Dresser


“Don’t mind if I do”.

Soviet Cruise 70s 80s Russia - HAIR

It’s all laughs and jokes now, but when that vodka kicks in Barbara tells Burt she’s been cheating on him because he’s too overbearing. Then it all turns a bit dark. She falls overboard carrying a head injury caused by a blunt instrument. She drowns. No one ever found out Burt was to blame. He played the mourning lover to a tee. No one suspected a thing. Burt now works in the Asda at Brighton marina. £5.57 an hour. Not bad really. He just stocks shelves and other menial tasks. So he still has the mental energy left at the end of the day to continue writing his memoirs.

Soviet Cruise 70s 80s Russia - James Bond

More on next page…


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