Vlad the Impaler is a household name throughout Europe and beyond. He has become synonymous with the vicious and the blood thirsty. But despite his infamy, I really didn’t know much about him, other than his violent streak of course, so I had a delve…
Vlad III was born in 1448 and died at the age of 45. He was known as Vlad the Impaler only posthumously, before his death he was known as Vlad III Dracula, Prince of Wallachia, or more impressively: “Kazikli Bey” – The Impaler Lord, my personal fave. He was a member of the House of Drăculești and was the famous inspiration for Bram Stoker’s classic novel of 1897 – Dracula. Dracula actually means “Son of Dragon” in Romanian, due to his father being a member of the Order of the Dragon, a group that enforced and protected Christianity throughout Eastern Europe.
He was born in Transylvania in the Kingdom of Valahia (Wallachia), an area fraught with conflict. Battles between the Ottoman, Islamic regime and the Hungarian pro-Catholic dogma were always prevalent. A fitting back drop to breed a monster.
Vlad had two older half brothers and one younger brother called Radu III The Handsome; that name’s a lot to live up to isn’t it?
Vlad was most famous for his cruelty, as we all know. Much of the evidence for this comes from German manuscripts which became popular after his life had ended, but there are many references from both Ottoman and Hungarian sources that talk of his twisted penchant for impaling people. A German pamphlet from 1521 reads:
He let children be roasted; those, their mothers were forced to eat. And (he) cut off the breasts of women; those, their husbands were forced to eat. After that, he had them all impaled
It’s estimated that he laid waste to between 40,000 and 100,000 people during his reign. Pretty impressive going by anyone’s standard, not even Obama has reached those heady heights… yet. There are German wood cuttings showing him feasting at a solitary table, nestled amongst his victims on spikes whilst others are tortured. Most of his killings were politically motivated, but sometimes he killed merely to cure boredom. He hanged his victims, stretched them on the rack, burned them at the stake, boiled them alive, but mostly impaled them.
One of Vlad’s infamous mass slaughterings was on the feast of St Bartholemew where he had 20,000 citizens impaled one sunny afternoon. During the massacre one of his footmen held his nose to block out the aroma of death and decay, so Vlad had him impaled too. Vlad wasn’t all bad though, he thoughtfully raised him above the other corpses so that he wouldn’t be bothered by the smell. He sat by and had his lunch amongst the bedlam and occasionally had a servant dip his bread in the dying’s blood so he could savour the taste of life. I see where Bram Stoker was coming from.
On another occasion Vlad invited hundreds of poor folks into the dining hall of his castle. He served them a good filling meal and as they ate, Vlad and his staff exited the hall and locked the door. His archers then shot in flaming arrows and roasted them all alive. For literally no reason.
On another occasion an Ottoman army turned back in terror when they saw thousands of rotting corpses on the banks of the Danube. Mehmed II (more on him later) returned to Constantinople after witnessing 20,000 impaled bodies outside Vlad’s capital. But what could have produced such a monster? Well, as a child, he and his brother were held imprisoned by Sultan Murad where they were beaten daily and regularly starved. Through a narrow window Vlad was able to watch as less fortunate prisoners were tortured to death, often via impalement.
For those who want to know more details, impalement involved being lowered slowly onto a large wooden spike, men through the anus, women through the vagina. Death was slow and excruciating of course and Vlad couldn’t get enough of it.
But there was more to Vlad’s history than his twisted love of impaling, his reign was split into three rounds…..
Before his first reign began there was a rebellion of the boyars, who were basically noblemen who were incredibly important and even more power-hungry. These boyars killed Vlad II Dracul and also his eldest son who they blinded and buried alive. The Ottomans didn’t want Wallachia to be under Hungarian control, so they invaded and put Vlad III Dracula on the throne in 1447. The Hungarians then attacked again and deposed him, so he legged it to Moldovia for a while.
His second turn on the throne was longer and was when he really made his mark. Wallachia was a mess, so he got busy. He improved the army, he increased trade nationally and internationally along with tightening laws on theft which had become rife in the area. He killed off many of the troublesome boyers, he knew that their constant machinations to gain personal power were damaging the country. In positions of power he placed more lowly knights and peasants. This had a two-fold effect; Vlad knew these folks were more likely to stay loyal, and it made him more popular with the masses.
Vlad’s Wallachia was virtually crime free due to the absolute terror which he had instilled in every beating heart. He used to leave a gold cup in the town square as proof that no one would dare thieve anything. No surprise, the cup was never nicked.
Vlad III Dracula viewed women as tools, as illustrated in the following tale: he was travelling through the countryside and saw a farmer wearing an incomplete garment. Vlad asked why his clothes weren’t finished; the farmer replied that his wife had been too ill to finish them. Vlad thought this was a rubbish excuse and had her dragged from her sick-bed and impaled forthwith.
In 1459 Sultan Mehmed II of the Ottoman Empire sent a couple of envoys to collect “tribute” from The Impaler Lord, i.e. a tax of 10,000 ducats and 500 recruits for his army. Vlad wanted Wallachia to remain independent so was not eager to do anything that would hint that he was owned by anyone. So he killed the envoys by nailing their turbans to their heads. Ouch.
Mehmed was of course not amused and sent one of his most trusted chaps – Hamza Pasha, along with 1000 cavalry to teach Mr Impaler a lesson for being so naughty. Vlad was ready though, he ambushed them in a narrow pass and impaled them all on wooden spikes with Hamza on the highest spike to denote his rank.
In 1462 Vlad III crossed the Danube disguised as a Turkish Sipahi and smashed up some more Ottoman camps. He wrote in a letter to Corvinius:
I have killed peasants men and women, old and young, who lived at Oblucitza and Novoselo, where the Danube flows into the sea….. We killed 23,884 Turks without counting those whom we burned in homes or the Turks whose heads were cut by our soldiers
Mehmed was, of course, more than a little miffed at this and raised an army of around 90,000 men and marched on Wallachia. Vlad had only 30-40,000 but still managed to prevent them crossing the Danube. Vlad III made many small attacks and the exasperated opposition ended up retreating.
Vlad Dracula’s signature
Mehmed II wasn’t done with this guy, so he recruited Vlad’s handsome little brother to lead another attack. Vlad was running out of cash so he went to Hungary to ask for more funds, but instead of getting help he got locked in a dungeon for high treason. How long he was imprisoned for is unclear, some say he was there for as long as 10 years. He was only released on the promise that he turned Catholic and married the King of Hungary’s cousin. Obviously, anything is better than a Hungarian dungeon so he begrudgingly accepted.
His brother died in 1475 and Vlad III took the throne for the third time, but he was assassinated just 2 months into the post. His manner of death is not known, but he was found mutilated in a bog after a battle with his old foes the Turks.
Despite being a blood thirsty ruler, he is still revered in Hungary and Romania where he is looked upon as a hero. He was an able voivode (warrior), spoke many languages and was a dab hand on a horse.
So to end this cheery tale here’s a fact for you: Prince Charles is one of Vlad the Impaler’s descendants. How about that? Charles stars in a Romanian Tourist Board promo video and says
The genealogy shows I am descended from Vlad the Impaler, so I do have a bit of a stake in the country.
Good one Charlie old boy.
